Tuesday, May 25, 2004
Mystery for a Day
reminds me of the old days
During my not so far-flung highschool days, there were several perplexing mysteries that to-date, are still ambigous in solution.
1. What is underneath Ms. Mojika's (i dunno the spelling) long sleeves?
2. What is inside the door along the stairs of the Maceda Building that leads to the second floor?
3. What ever happened to Sir Agustin?
4. What ever happened between Ms. Labay and Mrs. Lucena?
5. Why did Sir Nuval leave MaSci?
6. Are there ghosts roaming in MaSci?
7. What ever happened to Mrs. Yano?
8. How the heck did we lose in the STEP Parliamentary Procedure?
9. What's up with Mrs. Yumang and Mr. Bangayan?
10. In what year did the first MaScian set foot on Paco Park to practice?
(I know this list is just the tip of the iceberg so feel free to post more in the Comments)
But one of the greatest highschool mystery that stood out from the rest and which became the subject of my interest for the day is - What in the world is Grimace?
Yup, for the whole day, that bouncing overweight McDonald's mascot has been bugging my consciousness. About hours ago, I was sure that Json was right when he repeatedly told us (Moshies) that Grimace is just a tastebud. Well, I believed him but because of an e-mail, I am led to believe otherwise.
Hindi ka ba naku-curious kung ano o sino si Grimace??? Sa mga hindi pa
nakakaalam... si Grimace ay yung batchoy na kulay ube na mascot ng
McDo. Ano ba siya? At ano ba ang papel nya sa buhay ni Ronald? Sabi sa
website ng McDo, eto daw si Grimace:
"Grimace is a big, loving, fuzzy purple fellow who is Ronald McDonald's
best friend. He's sure Ronald is the world's ultimate authority on
everything. While Grimace loves all McDonald's foods, he's absolutely
crazy about milkshakes. Grimace is very enthusiastic and eager to try new
things. His joyous spirit helps everyone overlook the fact he's a little
slow and clumsy sometimes."
Ows? E ano naman ngayon?!? Actually, si Grimace ay kontrabida na may
anim na kamay na nagnenenok ng milkshakes. Ika nga sa isang website:
"Between Hamburglar (who stole burgers), the Fry kids (who stole
fries), and Grimace, crime was running rampant in the 'McHood."
O di ba... napakagandang ehemplo sa mga kabataan?? Pero ang
pinakamagandang mga teorya ay galing (kanino pa?) kundi sa mga Pilipino:
unang teorya: Si Grimace ay isang ube mascot. Ung McDo marahil ay may
ice cream o shakes na ube ang flavor.
pangalawa: Si Grimace ay bastardong anak ni Tinky Winky ng Teletubbies
(na natsitsismis na bakla) at isang eggplant.
pangatlo: Siya ay violet na krayola na iniwan ng mga bata (sa
playground ng McDo) sa araw para matunaw.
pang-apat: Grape-flavored drink daw si Grimace... kaya lang maasim un
drink kaya nagmukhang grimace sila... kaya siya tinawag na Grimace!
panlima: Siya daw ang pinaka-suwangit na mascot ng McDo, kaya siya
pinasuot ng costume - purple na costume daw ito na napaka-bigat na
hindi na matanggal! Hehe!
pang-anim: Si Grimace ay lahat ng pagkain sa McDo na hinalo sa
blender....
pampito: Siya ay isang milkshake. Period.
pangwalo: In-introduce daw ng McDo ang kamote french fries sa Pinas ng
pumunta daw sila dito. Kaya daw may mascot na Grimace. Isa siyang
kamote.
pangsiyam: Kakambal pala siya ni Ronald McDonald, kaya lang, retarded
daw si Grimace kaya siya pinasusuot ng purple
costume.
pang-sampu: Kakambal nya si Barney the dinosaur pero wala syang buntot
kaya pinalayas sya at napunta sa McDonald Land.
pero ito ang pinakamatinong teorya so far...
pang-labing-isa: Si Grimace, kasama ng iba pang mascotsn ng McDo, ay
pinakilala noong 70's. Siya ang nagrepresent ng Blueberry
milkshakes na ni-launch sa US. Ang tawag talaga sa kanya ay Evil
Grimace, kasi nga nagnenenok siya ng milkshakes. Galing siya sa isla na puno
ng sigla at puro milkshakes. (Ok, whatever...)
E ano ba ang official word ng McDo???
Well, may tumawag sa McDo to ask nga kung sino ba talaga si Grimace...
Alam mo kung ano ang sinabi ng babaeng sumagot ng phone.....???
"He's a potato."
Uh... okay! Whatever....hello. Sa mga hindi nakakaalam kung ano c
grimace..here's the REAL ANSWER...
GRIMACE symbolizes one product McDo USED to have na of course, WALA na
ngayon. GRIMACE stands for the TARO MILKSHAKE na dati sine-serve ng
Mcdo.
This is a fact mga pips. Bahala ka na kung maniwala ka o
hindi...Alamat nga eh.
P.S. After drinking too many milkshakes, most people probably would resemble
Grimace.
Oh well, there are so many theories on who Grimace is. One even said that it (since we don't know what it's gender is) is the mixture of the colors of the capitalist clown ruler Ronald McDonald. You know what I have to say to that? SHUT UP ASS WIPE. How could people see a mascot as a capitalist ploy? That is so typically sick of Americans. Oh well...
If we are to analyze Grimace's nature, it is good to start with the name. But, instead of making matters clearer, it is pretty obvious that the name Grimace is very misleading since it means an "unfunny laugh". But back in the 70's, when McDonald's commercials are everywhere, Grimace is a six-armed creature known as "The Evil Grimace" which mystically transformed into Ronald's best pal who always get into trouble.
Another interesting factoid is that this nudist without a genitalia is part of a gang of mascots with less mysterious origins that his.
Oh well, I have searched far and wide to uncover the secrets of this obese blob which I have always thought of as an UBE flavored sundae but unfortunately, I can't find a single specific answer. Yet as I am writing this article, a realization struck me like a shove in the butt, why in the world am I spending hours trying to figure out what a simple, lovable, and adorable fastfood mascot is? Well, it only goes to prove that mascots are for kids not for bummed wackos like me.
There is one thing that I find trully humorous. It is that all around the world, there are people who, just like me, is perplexed by the mystery of Grimace. Some even lead to forming their own wacky theories. So much has been said of this hunk of purpleness that has been a part of my life - as an entertainer in childhood and as a mystery in highschool - but whatever he is, he will always remain in my heart as that hefty chunk of pure happiness that made a billion people smile all over the world. No theory about his orgin can ever erase that fact. It only proves that in life, it doesn't matter what you are but it's what you can be.
@ 
yeh rrrryt. hehe. wudever! taro lang pala siya. si grimace ay isang gabi. matagal na ring nagswimming sa grey matter ko ang ultimate question na yan
Isn't it weird how that thing's name (I don't know what it is...a giant purple chicken nugget?) is "Grimace?" It's pretty horrible if you think about it. "Grimace." He's supposed to be esteemed by children, but they had to name him after an ugly facial expression. :(
hey there. Tet here. ORSEM? so you're going to Ateneo? Di ko alam kung ORSEM din tawag ng ibang schools. Anyway, enjoy ORSEM. masaya yan (I was once a freshman and a facilitator din). and see you in the games in july!
-tet (http://babymags.blogspot.com)
this was a great post! we somehow forget that many mysteries were never revealed to us while when we finally grew into adults, and these probably boggle the deepest crevices of our mind. personally, i like the taste bud answer the best :)
keep at it my child. pay me a visit and we can exchange links and cupcakes.
comedy talaga mga pilipino. >:] the whole grimace thing is mind boggling.
Si Grimace ay lahat ng pagkain sa McDo na hinalo sa blender.... -->haha, pwede rin. :]
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