Monday, February 09, 2004
When Words Wet in the Way
I always had this love-hate relationship with words. People say I'm a man of words, for I am talkative. I say I'm a man of words for I tried my best to choose the best one when the need arises. But I don't know. There are times I love to talk about things under the sun. People find comfort in talking. Admit it or not, we feel insecurity in silence. There is always that weird feeling that elopes our very being when we can't utter a single word wherein our minds and hearts are teeming with thoughts that want to burst out but cannot. But sometimes I feel security in silence. When all people talk, they tend to lose grasp of the reality around them. Most of us talk to be accepted. We bicker senseless strings of incoherent words just to get ourselves into the clique. We squander our precious time and effort just to snoop on other people’s lives. As far as this culture of ours is concerned, I hate talking. Unfortunately, I am but a young man that is trying to make his way in this dog eat dog world. I cannot wade against this culture - this pop culture as they say.
But back to talking…
Believe or not, outside this school of ours, I am but a man of few words. I don't talk as much. I don't bicker as much. I don't gossip us much. And what do people think of this misfit of society called silence - weird. You don't talk - you're sad. You don't gossip - you're not in. You don't crack a joke or two - you're a lame loser. I know, you say I'm cynical; I say you're a pragmatist.
But resilient I may be, I can't resist talking, especially those that will give me the edge of looking as witty as possible. When you're just a simple no-name guy who lives in society of ballers, rockers, and talented people, what else can you do? And I hate myself for it. I succumb to everything I stand for (this reminds me of many a things). I am but weak and frail. Maybe this is a sole reason why I have fallen for someone who value silence as much as I do but upholds it a million times greater than me. And I believe that silence is a virtue for from it, God speaks and so does your heart. Maybe that is the sole reason why she is so perfect.
pauses to think of her...
...snaps back to reality
Man! I just hate this trap of the world! Maybe words are one those that lure man into perdition. Again, I don't know. I am but a nerd. A nerd who loves. A nerd who cares. I AM DYING TO TALK TO HER!! But maybe, just maybe, there are some things deeper than words...
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